A THOUSAND VERSIONS OF YOU

All the world’s a stage, and all men and women merely players;

They have their exits and their entrances, and one man in his time plays their parts

-          William Shakespeare

We all have different roles to perform in our lives. A son, brother, friend, husband, colleague, superior officer and so on… But have you ever thought about this; that every person you meet in your life may not have the same view as you? And so exists a thousand versions of you.

We may have a character defined for our self and think that we are projecting the same to others. But since the receptors are different, perceptions also change. Each of them may perceive you differently based on the situations, purpose, and words. People judge you as what they are and not what as you are. Like they say “Your perception is not always the reality”.

It’s not about the communication skills that I am trying to make a point here. We all communicate to express our views and opinions. That will be reached exactly to the other person. But the version and perception of you formed in that particular situation will be different for different people in the same room.  Because people add up their own ideas also to create a newer you in their minds.

This thought that there is never a single version of us existing has given me a different view of myself. It’s an exciting thought on one side but on the other side, I feel it has something to ponder upon also. Are we the ones which we think we are or the ones we project to others? 

Well! We keep on changing and evolving from time to time. The people in our life may also change as we move on. I feel the impressions we leave behind are the ones that remain as a version of you in people’s mind. If you change then maybe the impressions you form will also be changed.

Life is a game of 3 parts

In the first part, you wonder what people think about you

In the second part, you don’t care what people think about you

It is in the third and final part, you realize that people were never thinking about you anyway

So, the point is not to worry about how others create a version of you in their minds but to focus on how a newer version of you is evolving in your own mind. Inner peace begins from the moment you choose not to allow another person to control your emotions. Because ultimately it has to be you to decide your version and even if it takes more than a thousand versions of yourself to shed and reach the better one, it’s worth going for.

THE KEY

Lord Krishna says in Bhagavad Gita

“duḥkheṣhv-anudvigna-manāḥ sukheṣhu vigata-spṛihaḥ

  vīta-rāga-bhaya-krodhaḥ sthita-dhīr munir uchyate"

'One whose mind remains undisturbed amidst misery, who does not crave for pleasure, and who is free from attachment, fear, and anger, is called a sage of steady wisdom.'

Happiness & Sorrow; Optimism & Pessimism; Light & Darkness; Love & Hate; Life is a mixture of all extremes. At some point or the other, we all face extreme emotions and situations. But what is the key to sustain all of them and move on with life? The key is BALANCE.

Work-life balance, emotional balance, Financial stability are the ‘general goals to achieve’ for most of us. They help us lead a comfortable life. Going a little deeper, the balance between our mind and heart is something we strive for. When there is a balance of thought between the logic of the mind and the emotion of the heart, the choices we make will be with more confidence and clarity.

On a broader note, I feel every event in the world is balanced by some other one. Like Newton’s third law says, ‘every action has an equal and opposite reaction’. If a ball is thrown on to the ground, it will bounce back with the same force. Also, all the matter in the Universe is constant. If there is a new matter created here, there will be an equal matter destroyed somewhere else. On the whole, everything is balanced.

Hence when the entire cosmos follows the Balance theory, and since we are also a part of this cosmos, I believe our emotions and life also follow the same. If you are facing difficulties today, there is going to be happiness with the same intensity tomorrow. Nothing is going to remain constant in life. Everything will be balanced. Like the saying goes, ‘This too shall pass'.

So, all we can do is to maintain equanimity of thought and equilibrium in emotion. Being positive in any situation helps us to face the life strongly and boldly. Because ultimately, everything will be balanced. So ‘Be kind, but don’t let people take advantage of you. Trust, but don’t be deceived. Be content, but never stop improving yourself.’

INSIDE OUT

You sow what you reap. You cannot expect a banana tree by planting an apple seed. Similarly, you cannot expect a positive output by feeding negative thoughts to the mind. What we believe inside is what we achieve. Therefore, it is important to tune our principles in life for achieving the desired results.

“Whatever we plant in our subconscious mind and nourish with repetition and emotion will one day become a reality.”- Earl Nightingale

Buddha believed that desire is the reason for sadness and hence he renounced every desire. Mother Teresa believed that she was born to serve and so she did her entire life. Yuvraj Singh has cured his cancer with his strong belief. This shows that our body reacts to our thought process.  Everyone has their own principles around which they construct their life. Faith is power. If you believe in something strongly, then that something will become your life because those principles lead you to choose accordingly. Those choices turn into actions and finally yield the desired outputs.

The best example of the strength of a belief on Earth is Religion. When many people believe in a set of principles, it becomes a religion, which becomes a way of life.

Therefore, choose your principles wisely, as that is what defines our life.

Thoughts-> Beliefs-> Principles-> Choices-> Your Life J

The Ink bottle

Every bad event in life will be balanced by a good one like every dark cloud has a silver lining. It’s common for any living being to face some or the other kind of tough situations in life. Many people end their lives out of depression or thinking there is no good left to happen in their lives anymore.

I believe that life is an empty book to script our own story. And the magic ink in our pen is the strength and persistence to complete the book till the last page, no matter what. Some make their stories bigger by facing more struggles, moulding themselves harder and coming out as a shining Diamond. However, some may exhaust their strength and drain out their inks, leaving behind their book unfinished.

It may sound idealistic to think positively every time and everywhere. But trust me, this attitude is what that makes all the difference. There is no one in this world who hasn’t faced problems or tough situations. Then why not face it a little differently?  Believe that there is a backup of a good event for every bad one. After all, pain is what that brings out the real potential; Struggle is what that gives us the strength.

At such times, we need an ink bottle to fill back the ink in our pens. That ink bottle may be different for different people. For some, it can be their loved ones. For some other, it can be a therapist, and for some other, it can be a goal or some kind of diversion. Because you never know what miracles, the magic ink might do. J K Rowling (Author of Harry Potter series) decided to end her life after parting with her husband. She sought professional help and we all know what she did with her “magic” ink.

There can be no success story without pain. Everyone may not have a great story, but everyone has a story to finish. That is what remains and can be an inspiration for someone to live.

“Taking your own life? Taking from who? Once it’s over, you will not miss it. Your own death is something that happens to everybody else. Your life is not your own. Keep your hands off it.”
                                                                                                                                                                                                      - Sherlock Holmes

In the end, everything will be okay. If it is not okay, then it is not the end. Complete your story...

PS: I wrote this blog after the disturbing news of my childhood classmate’s suicide. This blog is a small effort from my side to bring a new hope for someone in need.

Food for the Soul

Fruits, Vegetables, Green tea, exercise…what not! We try to give good nourishment to our bodies for maintaining a healthy body. However busy we are, we try to give some time to take care of our physical health so that we can be active and perform our daily activities well. Similar to body care, there is something called ‘You’ inside the body which also strives for some food to recharge itself. We can call it as ‘Food for the Soul’.

Each one of us gets recharged mentally by doing different things. These are some of my thoughts which can help us to strengthen the inner self-

Gratitude: Feeling thankful for whatever we have gives a positive outlook to our life. There are many people out there who don’t even have the basic necessities. Instead of cribbing for what we don’t have, it’s better to realize the value of what we have.

Love thy Self: Have you ever thought like this? ‘There is no one in this whole universe who is 100% like you’. It means there is one and only one ‘You’ in this world. Isn’t that so special? So love yourself for whatever you are and stop hurting the self. Talk to yourself appreciating for the positives and work on improving the negative ones. No one is perfect. So just Love yourself for whatever you are…One can love others and enjoy the life only when one loves oneself first.

Smile often: Do you know who the most beautiful person is? The one who smiles whole-heartedly like a baby. A Smile is positively contagious. Don’t you smile involuntarily by looking at a happy baby? Or a smiling person? Smiling and Laughing changes your mood instantly. So next time when you are dressed up, don’t forget to wear a Smile too… :D .

Time for your Passion: Everyone has their own passion. Though we are busy in our daily routine, allocate some time for your favorite hobby. It can be art, music, gardening, cooking, writing, volunteering for a social cause, reading, traveling etc., Anything of your favorite…Just do it. Trust me, it just rejuvenates your mind and gives new energy.

The Power of expression: We have so many thoughts and emotions running inside our mind. For some or the other reason, we may restrain from expressing them. This can cause Stress and negative emotions like frustration, depression. So whenever you feel any emotion that you don’t want to expose to others, just sit in a lonely place and vent out your feelings. This gives a lot of relief and frees your mind.

Life is a long journey and we carry our body and soul through many situations. We may not control the situations , but we can definitely mold our mind positively to face them. So always feed your mind with positive thoughts to nourish your soul. Just tell yourself ‘All z well’ :D

PRESENT, A 'PRESENT'

“Life is so full of care….

There is no time to stand and stare”

               

Yes we are all busy and in a hurry. We have worries about our past, plans and expectations for the future. But may be somewhere in this process, we forget to actually live in the moment.

                

Life is all about living :P. Yes, this phrase is very true if we really mean it. If we are mindful about every little thing we do, then we can enjoy the life to the fullest. Many of us wait for the weekends or vacation time to relax and enjoy. But by being mindful, we can even enjoy the boring things that cannot be avoided in our day-to-day life.

We wake up every morning with hundreds of thoughts in mind; reaching the office on time, giving the best for the presentation, last day to pay the bills etc., and all this thinking happens while getting ready, having coffee, going through the news and having a quick breakfast.  Actually, planning for the day is a good thing. But losing the moment is not necessary.

Enjoy your coffee fully…take in the swaad of that aloo parata fully :D…listen to your favourite songs in the traffic to boost up your morning. All this may sound simple but trust me…these small things make your routine lively and interesting.

It’s not just about the chores, but also about different experiences. When you are at work, being mindful makes you more productive. When you are with your family or friends, being there fully gives a lot of joy. Doing things with a whole presence of mind, body and soul brings completeness and boosts your happiness. Life is a mixture of both ups and downs. Experience both of them fully. Because one day, when we look back, we will have many things to cherish.

So all that we have is the PRESENT MOMENT... Mindfulness is the secret of happiness. :)

CONNECTING DOTS...

Everything in this world is connected. We would have heard this statement and related concepts like ‘butterfly theory’. All such theories say that every single event and every single thing in this world is connected and are related.

             

“Vasudaiva Kutumbakam” means that the Earth is all one family. Have you ever thought about our connection to some unknown people or events? Of course, in today’s world, we are all connected through internet. But imagine how exciting it is to know that whatever we do will also affect somewhere someone in this world.

                

Edison wouldn’t have known that his experiments inside the lab would change the future of this entire Earth. We recognized his invention and hence read his story on how he invented the electricity. This is a realized event. But imagine we may not know the reasons for the events we experience in our lives. Even simple acts are related to someone unknown in our lives. For example, we eat food which is grown by some farmer somewhere and we use things which involve labor work of some unknown person. We work in our offices for some client and through that you indirectly serve an unknown customer on time. So nothing goes in vain and every small act of us is justified in one or the other form in this world.

Every single event might have its effect on another event either directly or indirectly. Every phase of our life, every event in it has a reason. We realize the happy moments in the form of success but sometimes may not understand the reasons for bad ones. We may not understand the reason behind it right now or sometimes never. But still, everything happens for a reason. Trying to understand the reasons will only increase the anxiety.

Just hold faith in this universal chain of events and embrace every minute, event and phase of life responsibly. Because in the end, all the dots will be connected to form a meaningful picture :).